"It's Not a Cookie, Mama!

I couldn't sleep...so I'm blogging...

Last night it stormed like crazy here in our "hillbilly" haven. The storm knocked out our satellite for long time. Thankfully, it began just after Sebastian got out of the bathtub, so he was already clean & cozied up in his jammies. We watched out the big front window for a long time at the light show & Sebastian would squeal & jump at every crash of the thunder.

I decided that we would have a late night cookie snack (well, it was late for us at almost 9:00pm lol), since there was no Noggin or Tori & Dean to be watched. He dragged a chair up to the kitchen island and I pulled out the milk & cookies. He looked at me so serious & said, "It's not a cookie, Mama! Dat's O-we-o's!!" In fact, that was true. It was much more than a regular ol' cookie...it was an Oreo...a chocolate creme Oreo...mmmm!




It may not have been some monumental thing to anyone else, but it one of those moments that I hope I always remember when I look back on his childhood. Sticky chocolately fingers & a milk mustache. I can't imagine that memories can get any better than this.

After we got cleaned up, we climbed up in my bed and watched Wall-E...since he had it recorded on the DVR and our satellite was still out. I still have a pretty bad sunburn on my face from this past weekend, so I had smeared a gob of Noxzema all over my face. I guess Sebastian didn't really notice at first. He sat & watched Wall-E and he asked a gazillion questions (What is Wallwe doing? What is Wallwe watching? Where is Wallwe going?). He was very into what was going on with Wall-E and had lots of commentation. He said, "I love you Mama!" and went to kiss me and suddenly jerked away stunned. "I can't kiss you Mama. I will get burned!!"

I guess I was a little disappointed, but he was too cute to be disappointed for long. I have to say we had a really great night. Daddy cooked us dinner & cleaned the kitchen. The night wasn't rushed because I didn't have to get up early and get ready for work. I got to slow down & enjoy my son and enjoy being his Mama.

I don't get to stay at home with him, pick up & go or do whatever we please. I work long hours during the week which is sometimes hard on both of us. Obviously, I don't have a glamourous job, working in social services and apparently I have a rather depressing life according to some. I actually like my job (most of the time) and I have some really good friends that I enjoy working with who make it much easier to do the same thing day in & day out. I can definitely say my job keeps me grounded & reminds me that people have it so much worse off in life than I do.

This is just the life that we are used to - I am not exciting, not very interesting. I am not a different person than I was last month. I have my good days & my bad days like any other person on this Earth. I don't have enough hours in my day to give everyone everything that they want. I wish there was enough of me to make everyone happy because I do worry way too much about what other people think of me. A huge character flaw of mine. But, in reality no one can make everyone happy and make them happy all of the time.

Sebastian is happy, though! And loved & cared for more than he will ever know. He doesn't disown me when I don't have time to spend an extra hour outside playing on the swingset or read him an extra story at bedtime or get frustrated with him when he pees in the bathroom floor. He may have his 10-second trantrum, but he loves me no matter what & he tells me every single day even when I have not been the best Mama that day. That is really the only thing in my life that matters.